I received a heart felt facebook message from my old nanny. She told me how proud she was of me and how far I have come and how handsome I’ve become. It made me tear up a little. Its funny how someone you rarely think about can come back into your life and give you words of encouragement.
When you love someone with your all
sometimes you stop getting tired of the pain
and hold on to the rare moments that they make you feel wanted, with dear life.
Believing you’ll change
is just a foolish game I play alone
because the guy I fell in love with
just doesn’t live inside you anymore.
Tonight, I’ll be cursing the day you walked into my life
while still wishing you were here to make things alright.
I’m tired of fighting with myself.
I tell myself that I should fucking hate you but my heart seems to see things differently.
I lie to myself
pretending that I’m fine
but me and God know
I am far from being alright.
I have a hole in my chest
that yearns for a place
in your life
that can’t be so easily replaced.
Sometimes bottling up your emotions
means drowning them with the same stuff
you hated seeing your father drunk on the couch with.
Sometimes caring is the biggest mistake.
Because you realize your error when it’s already far too late.
Those fake I love you’s were so damn convincing, but I applaud you, you acted your ass off. I got to give you credit.
I’ll give her the dick painful and rough,
and pretend that what we’re doing resembles something like true love.
I can’t promise I’ll love you in the morning.
But right now you’re looking beautiful and I’m horny.
Come suck on this dick
like its the last thing your lips will ever taste
before the zombie apocalypse.
Bite my neck
dig your nails into my back
and leave me marks on my skin.
Fuck me with hatred
like I just killed your mother.
Heart breaking leads to art making.
But I love you’s
will always the most tragic piece of them all.